Three Months: Dear Jonah

On Thursday, January 19th my baby turned three months old. This is the letter I wrote to him.

Dear Jonah my sweet baby boy,

 As I sit here staring at the picture I took of you this morning, I am overcome with so many emotions. Love most of all. I began writing down all the things that have happened in the past month and all the things you’ve accomplished and I feel so much love, pride, joy, and truthfully some sadness. I realize I need to treasure you more and not just capture the moments. I take my camera out every day and I literally have 555 photos on my iPhone – most of them are of you. The photos are proof of the time we spend together, but I still feel like I’m missing things. Am I really present in the little moments?

Holding Mommy's hand at three months and at eleven days

You are such a joy. Your little spirit just shines. I see it in your eyes and your unbelievably sweet smile. Your recognition of my face is the most rewarded I have ever felt. Still, I feel the need to slow down and just adore you. For the first time last night, I sat on the couch with you in my lap, no music, no tv, lights dim and just read you a bedtime story and you fell fast asleep. I put you down in your crib and attempted to go to my own room and sleep. Without you right next to me it is honestly hard to sleep. Midnight came, but sleep did not. I kept checking the monitor and watched for your breath. After your late night bottle, you spent the rest of the night in your cradle next to my bed where you belong – for now.

 

I get so excited every day at the sound of your voice. Your ohs, oos, ahs, das, and so many more bring me such joy. Your cries, though I’m used to them, still bring me heartache. I think back often to the day you were born, because I want to remember every detail. I remember most you crying and crying when you came into the world. It was so comforting to hear your cry and heartbreaking that I couldn’t quite comfort you. I can remember the way your skin felt when they laid you on my chest, but many of the memories have faded and are a little blurry now. However, I distinctly remember how I missed you when they took you out of our room for this or that. I was usually very close to tears by the time they brought you back. I feel that way even now some days.

I cannot believe it has been three months since that day. A quarter of a year has gone by since your birthday and I feel like it was just a few days ago and at the same time it feels like it was a whole lifetime ago. You have made my life better. You have made me better. I want time to stand still, so I can just absorb who you are right now today. I also know that you will grow and I want you to strive, do your best and be everything you were born to be. You are so loved. Don't grow up too fast sweet boy.

I will love you always,

Mommy

 If you have a sweet, funny, crazy or frustrating story to tell about your little (or big) ones just add your story or link up here! PLEASE! =) You can also link to any past post! I want to hear your stories about mommyhood!

 

All photos taken with my iPhone 4S - some edited with Instagram (follow me: stephaniesclark).
Mini 3 month photo shoot coming soon!